Monday, May 30, 2005

Look Out Liverpool

Steampackets founder, Luke Roolker, was seen approaching Prime Minister John Howard on his daily walk this morning. It is believed that he is petitioning to have the Geelong Area, or at the very least Steampacket Gardens, to be declared an independent country.

Roolker has already put the paperwork in for Geelong to be declared part of the EEC and is confident that once it has gained freedom from the Commonwealth there should be nothing to stop the Steampackets bid to dominate the world football scene.

“First we get independence from Australia, then we get declared a European country. After that there will be no way the UEFA can deny our membership.” said Roolker, who has tried many times to get the Steampackets into the Champion’s Cup but has been denied on the simple technicality that the club is not European (and once because the Union does not accept applications written in crayon).

The team’s management is confident that the Steampackets will be able to show this week’s surprise champions, Liverpool, a thing or two, should they get the chance.

“We won’t be happy until we’ve made every club in the UEFA run around the pitch with its pants down.”

If you would like to run around the pitch with your pants down, come to Steampacket Gardens every Tuesday and Friday lunchtime.

Rob Jennings,

Steampackets Media Liaison.

The Callista Steampackets: Skill is not an Option


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