Monday, May 29, 2006

Farewell Matheson

Last Friday saw the Steampackets play a testimonial game to one of its tallest members, Anthony Matheson.

True to his recent game form, Matheson, who is spending the next year on a European fact finding mission for the Steampackets, decided not to attend the game held in his honour.

“I thought about coming along, but then I decided to ‘Do a Victor’ as they say,” said Matheson, referring to ex-Steampacket Victor Chen, who began the trend of not turning up to your own tribute game.

Matheson will begin his fact-finding mission in Germany, the home of this year’s World Cup. “I’ll be scouring Germany for the best talent the world has to offer. I also hear there’s some soccer games on while I’m there, so I might go to one of them, too.”

Matheson will continue throughout the rest of Europe, constantly keeping an eye out for any potential Steampackets. “I’ve wanted to go to Amsterdam ever since I saw Pulp Fiction, and I’m hoping to find a few players in Spain. I think that anyone who thinks running with the bulls is a good idea has the right mentality to be a Steampacket. I’ll then head over to England, but I don’t expect to find much sporting ability there.”

If you have the required lack of self-preservation instincts, and think you can fill Matheson’s size 16 shoes, then come along to Steampacket park on Tuesdays and Fridays.

Rob Jennings,

Steampackets Media Liaison.

The Callista Steampackets: Skill is not an Option

Monday, May 22, 2006

New Media Funding

The new Steampackets budget was handed down this week by Treasurer Kim Mazaraki, with funding going to new equipment, new players and a small sum going to the media department.

“I don’t know if people have noticed,” said Mazaraki, “but we ran out of crayons and butcher’s paper a few weeks ago, which meant that our Media Liaison was unable to write or submit any articles.”

In a rather schizophrenic interview, Rob Jennings, the Steampackets Media Liaison, said that it was good that the Media department had had a break, as the articles were getting a little predictable.

“Sometimes,” said Jennings, “it seems like they interview the same people over and over again, to produce the same basic article week after week. I mean half the time I think that idiot Jennings just makes stuff up on the spot… That recorder’s not turned on is it?”

In other news, President Adrian Dillon mixed a metaphor and Treasurer Kim Mazaraki did something dodgy with club funds. Club Manager, Adrian Roberts made comments about attendance at the games, and everyone made a joke about Dinil Wijesinghe.

If you would like to get your name in an article, then come down to Steampacket Park on Tuesday and Friday lunchtimes.

Rob Jennings,

Steampackets Media Liaison.

The Callista Steampackets: Skill is not an Option